Ray Stevens: Crackin' Up

1987 was the year that Ray Stevens released this comedy album. As anyone can tell, the title of the album, CRACKIN' UP, is played out on the album's cover picture with Ray dressed up in Humpty Dumpty attire. The nursery rhyme goes that the character sat on a wall and then had a great fall...resulting in his body breaking into many pieces. The album's picture doesn't quite get that graphic, thankfully, but the phrase "cracking up" has long been associated with people who start laughing, usually at something funny, or often times the phrase is used to describe someone who's slowly going insane. Either usage is perfect for a comedy album.

The album consisted of 10 comedy songs...it's success was centered around the lead-off song, "Would Jesus Wear a Rolex?". The album itself became a solid Top-30 hit on the album chart...most of it's publicity centering around "Would Jesus Wear a Rolex?".

In fact, when the album was issued, it clearly publicized the single on the picture sleeve in red letters underneath Humpty's wall: Includes the Hit Single "Would Jesus Wear a Rolex?". On the vinyl album version, a red sticker appeared on the top right hand side promoting the single's inclusion on the album seen below...



There were a few cassette copies of this album that had different lettering designs. For starters, the cassette copy I have shows the name of the album in deep purple letters that you can hardly see and the title letters are written in a "cracked" style to go along with the album title. Also, on my cassette copy the promotion of the lead-off single is written in red letters...Then there was a version issued later with white lettering...and the single promo was written in black letters along the bottom of the wall instead of in red letters...here it is...

Ray is credited as a co-writer on several of the songs on this album. This is an album that is purposely nutty...the sort of novelty songs that once were a tradition on the Grand Ole Opry in the 1940's and 1950's. In fact, Ray covers a classic novelty song on this album...and given how much better recording technology was in 1987 compared to the 1940's, Ray was able to modernize the sound of a particular novelty song classic I'll write about further in this blog entry.

I am none too sure when this cassette version was issued...it's a thumbnail as is the above picture so click them for a bigger look. I don't know if this was the original cassette design with that large black space underneath, which doesn't match the album's color and it doesn't promote "Would Jesus Wear a Rolex?" as the other cassette does...so, anyway, this album had a series of design changes through the years. It was issued on CD for the first time in the early 1990's. It was featured as one of the CD's in the 3-CD collection, THE INCREDIBLE WORLD OF RAY STEVENS.

For those unaware...the single, "Would Jesus Wear a Rolex?", is about the televangelists of America who preached sermon's on television, mostly on Sunday mornings. The irony of these televangelists were their income...quite a few of them were living the life of your typical Hollywood celebrity with lavish homes and millions of dollars in their bank accounts. The jewelery that often dangled from the men and women on religious programs was often compared to what one would see at any Paris fashion show or Hollywood glamor photo session.

So, the question was asked in song: Would Jesus Wear a Rolex on his television show? Just by coincidence, a televangelist scandal had broke into the national news and this song was already on the charts...the scandal helped the single become a more widely known hit. According to one of the song's co-writers, Chet Atkins, he remarked that the idea of the song came from common sense observations of televangelist's lifestyles in general and before he knew it, televangelists were under fire almost simultaneously as the single was rising on the charts.

I've talked about "Would Jesus Wear a Rolex?" so much you all must be wondering what else is on the album!?!

After the lead-off song we have "Three Legged Man", a nutty tale about a man who's in love with a woman but her husband naturally objects. The husband has a peg-leg and so Ray has the idea to steal the man's wife one morning while it's still dark outside and just for good measure he decides to steal the man's peg-leg. Ray and the woman go on the run in the country with the husband in hot pursuit...hopping and flopping on one leg.

The third song is a satirical look at Willard Scott, the now-former weatherman on the TODAY SHOW who had this large fan base comprised mostly of middle-aged to older women. The song examines Willard's sex appeal and his charm and Ray plays the part of a frustrated farmer who's wife, grandmother, and aunt all sit around chit-chatting about and watching Willard...Ray vocally impersonates his sex-hungry grandmother who wants to travel the world with Willard while she wears exotic clothing bought at Frederick's of Hollywood. It's mentioned that Willard mentioned the grandmother's birthday, further endearing the weatherman to the grandmother.

The fourth song is Ray's version of a classic novelty song called "I'm My Own Grandpaw". The grandpa in the song's title is deliberately mis-spelled to make the song-title look funnier. The original recording, the one most historians cite, is Lonzo and Oscar's 1947 recording. Their recording of the song is considered the definitive version but I feel that Ray added more to the song. I feel that he gave the song a more livelier arrangement that was lacking in the original. The 1947 version is sung pretty much straight through...with almost no pausing between verses or much music accompanying the duo. Ray's cover version features a better arrangement and much more added musical accompaniment...and Ray brings life to the lyrics instead of singing them without much of a pause. Once you hear the 1947 recording and Ray's 1987 recording, musically speaking, Ray's cover far out-shines the Lonzo and Oscar recording in my opinion.

The fifth song is "The Ballad of Cactus Pete and Lefty", a song Ray co-wrote with C.W. Kalb, Jr. who goes by the nick-name of Buddy a lot of the time. The song is a spoof of the old west...a story about a miner and his pet sidewinder snake named Lefty. The two live in a miner's shack and are consistently on the hunt for whatever strikes their fancy. Lefty, it explains, has dental problems...as well as being the recipient of having a long neck...and he's always eager for food...whenever Cactus Pete mentions anything edible, we hear Lefty get excited. Of course, in order for listeners to hear Lefty's excitement we hear a sound effect of a rattle. Sidewinder rattlesnakes are known for their appetite and this is spoofed in this song as Lefty is always hungry and will eat just about anything: lizzards, Gila monsters, eagles, toads, frogs, etc etc.

The sixth song, "Sex Symbols", is actually a spoof of sorts. A few years earlier Willie Nelson and Latin singer Julio Iglesias teamed to form an unlikely but ultimately popular duo team with their biggest duet being "To All the Girls I've Loved Before". Well, on the sixth song on this album from Ray we hear him singing a "duet" with a man named Julio. It's Ray, of course, playing the part of Julio. The two sing about various sex symbols...with Ray not quite picking out sex appeal material with his choices of Grandpa Jones, Jerry Clower, or George Lindsey. That's why the song is so funny...Julio continues to scold Ray for mis-pronouncing his name. Ray pronounces Julio's name with a J instead of an H. Ray also states that he's got loads of sex appeal but Julio objects to Ray's self-assured statements. Whenever Ray performed the song in concert or on TV he'd have a dummy of Julio sitting on his lap, playing the part of half-singer/half-ventriloquist.

The seventh song is another co-write for Ray. "Gourmet Restaurant" tells the story of a man who walks into a restaurant unaware that it's a foreign establishment and he proceeds to order all sorts of food that to him appears raw and disgusting. When he's brought out a plate of Cherries Jubilee he dumps a bowl of cold soup on it because the dish was "on fire" he says. He creates quite a scene that by song's end they throw him out and tell him never to come back.

The eighth song is a comical love song...the song's title, "The Flies of Texas Are Upon You" is a parody of an earlier song called "The Eyes of Texas Are Upon You" but that's where the similarities end. In Ray's song we hear the story about a man who meets a woman who he thinks is the daughter of a millionaire given how she explained that her father "cleaned up" out in Texas. Well, when the guy arrives in Houston he finds that the woman's father isn't a millionaire but rather the owner of a garbage truck service...with flies and trash everywhere.

The ninth song takes a stab at the medical profession. "Doctor, Doctor Have Mercy On Me" is a satire on the AMA, the American Medical Association...well, doctors in general. In it, Ray describes all of the flaws and inconveniences of going to the hospital or seeing the doctor for anything. The song makes a comment on the salary of many doctor's and the fraternity atmosphere that often is on display in many hospitals and how a hospital is to a doctor what a country club is to a golfer: a place to hang out and socialize.

In the final song, "The Day That Clancy Drowned", we hear about a man who worked at the Milwaukee Brewery for decades but then one fateful day the worker was making his rounds when he fell into a 60,000 gallon vat of beer and drowned. Contrary to what one might think upon hearing, the song is a perfect way to close out an album of nutty comedy songs. The reverent funeral music that opens up the song makes it more funny...and the recollections of former workers talking about how Clancy wouldn't die quietly...no, Clancy had to swim and splash around and have a jolly good time as he was drowning. In spite of fellow co-workers trying to rescue Clancy, he fought their attempts. The lesson of the song is simply put: lots of men love their beer!!